fine. lied by omission to Herself's face. then spent 1500 years colluding with a demon. then told the heavenly quartermaster to get fucked b4 flying off to earth w/out a body and possessing some human. u were absolutely prepared 2 square up to lucifer fucking morningstar and then, the cherry on top, walked into hell and laughed in everyone's face.
It'd match your eyes, but no one would know, would they? Oh, I just realized! You're already in Hufflepuff colors, with a splash of Gryffindor.
Well...
When you list it all out like that, it does sound rather brave. But I don't think a Gryffindor would have taken quite as long as I did to finally do the right thing.
this is treachery of the highest order. i am DEFINITELY not a gryffinpuff how could you think such things of me, i'm just going to have 2 keep these montblancs all 2 myself
neway i think the whole point of courage is that u get there eventually, even if it takes a while. and u had a lot on ur plate 2 deal with
Fine, fine, you're the puffiest of ravens, the huffle with the most claws. Better?
You're generous to say so. You were very brave, too, Crowley, even if you don't want to use that as a defining characteristic. I wouldn't have come around when I had if not for the example you set for me.
You're welcome. If you weren't already such a lovely snake, you'd make a fine raven.
I *wanted* to believe that Heaven was going to come through in the end. I'm still convinced that if I had gotten ahold of God instead of Metatron, it would have made a difference, but otherwise I should have listened to you sooner.
Did I ever apologize for how I treated you? I'm sorry for that, I truly am. I hope I've made it up to you since then.
and u'd make a lovely lion with ur curly mane. or a gryffin. i mean isn't that what a gryffinclaw would be anyway? the lion and the eagle mixed. since ur p damn clever on top of brave
idt neone's getting ahold of Her. not even the higher authorities. w/ the great plan shot 2 shit, i think every1 is p much rudderless now. gotta start thinking 4 themselves.
and u don't have nething to be sorry about and there's nothing 2 make up. i should have been more patient w/ what u were going thru.
That's very flattering, but a gryffinclaw would be a lion and a raven, not the classical gryphon of mythology. And it doesn't matter, I'd argue for Hufflepuff with the Sorting Hat until it got tired of hearing me talk and sorted me accordingly.
That's going to be an intense challenge for Upstairs.
You were patient with me for a very long time, there's nothing to be sorry for, my dear.
Oh, no, absolutely not. Ambitious is the very last word you could use to describe me.
I think Michael can manage. It took all my effort not to gawk when she showed up in Hell with a pitcher of holy water. I don't know about the other three. Do you think they're just as lost Downstairs? I mean, they must be, they lost their cleverest demon.
That is very sweet of you to say. <3 Even if you are mangling the English language, one text at a time.
[He actually doesn't mind it that much, except for 'nething'. And mostly because he tried to look it up in the dictionary before realizing what Crowley actually meant.]
no but you are cunning. mind like a corkscrew. i don't think neone else could work out agnes nutter's prophecies as fast as u.
ur right. michael is the kind of wanker who tends to do alright. on my end tho? downstairs is gonna be a mess. 14th century thinkers the whole lot of them. legion is about the only one with a clue about modernity, and u should see how they treat him. aspects of the poor bastard getting thrown to the hellhounds just 4 a laff.
a shame u missed computing in the 90s and early 2000s. u should have seen when i invented 1337 5p3ak
[ Because that could only come from Crowley's own devious machinations to drive the humans utterly up the wall with inane nonsense. ]
Flatter me all you like, I refuse to be sorted into Slytherin. Let me stay in Huffleclaw with you. We're on our own side, remember?
Let's hope they keep their messes to themselves, then. I don't want to spend any more time thinking about them and their problems than I have to. We're retired, we should enjoy ourselves.
[Guaranteed to drive a certain angel up the wall, as well.]
Did your phone just have a glitch? All I see are random letters and numbers.
someone ought to flatter u. lots of flattering things about u to remark on. and i agree, couple of ravenpuffs, the two of us. tbf the entire sorting thing is a load of bollocks neway. how does a tatty old hat know the deep-rooted values of a bunch of 11 yr olds who haven't even had their first algebra class yet? j/s seems a bit dodgy u know, having a hat rooting around in kids brains? i'd probably call child services.
if they do show up, we'll just come up w/ another clever ruse 2 scare the piss out of them and send them packing.
lmfao angel it's probably 4 the best u don't know. the dark ages of computing, terrible times, so much glow-in-the-dark lipstick it was definitely not a look 4 me
Only if that someone is you, and only if I am allowed to flatter you in return.
Of course a hat can't know any of that. The whole sorting business saves Rowling the effort of proper characterization. She can have all the "bad" characters in one house with a few exceptions as plot twists.
Well, I wouldn't mind switching bodies with you again, if it comes down to it. Regardless, I won't let them touch you.
What does glow-in-the-dark lipstick have to do with anything? And don't sell yourself short, I'll bet you looked nice.
angel r u implying that people are complicated? and defined by more than one trait ??? and that what counts as brave, loyal, clever etc. r all extremely subjective concepts? also j/s hufflepuffs got utterly short changed. the only interesting one died and turned into the worst vampire ever
u know u can inhabit my body any time. and likewise, i won't let them get get their dirty hands on u.
i didn't. dayglo green does nothing 4 my complexion and the hair extensions + wires were a Mistake. so so many regrets. absolutely killed it with the eyeliner tho.
Not only am I implying, I am saying it outright. Or typing it, rather. They may be novels geared towards children, but that's no excuse to simplify characters to only one or two qualities. And yes, Hufflepuffs are barely acknowledged, except I don't remember any of them turning into a vampire?
Is it your turn to be implying something, dear? We'll keep each other safe. It's been my highest priority for centuries.
I am having an extremely difficult time picturing what you're describing. Wires in your hair? I'll need a photo of this to get a better sense of it.
same actor who played the dead one in the film adaptations played the romantic lead from that teen romance with vampires about a decade back. for a time you couldn't go to any website without someone voicing one opinion or another about it.
not implying anything. dead serious - if u ever get discorporated again, ur very welcome to hop in my corporation. it might be a little cramped but i can budge up and make room.
ughhhhhhh i'll dig up the photos one day they're a laff. and u'll see what i mean about the lipstick idt anyone can pull off neon without the aid of photoshop
And clever, and handsome as well. Did I leave anything out?
Oh... the movies. [Aziraphale would insert an eye roll emoji here if he used them.] I'm aware of the vampire romance you're referring to, it was not my cup of tea.
Crowley, I wasn't kidding when I said that if I tried to possess your body, we'd probably explode. An angel and a demon's soul in one body is too dangerous. I appreciate the sentiment, though.
Jolly good! I suppose this was a very short-lived look on you as I don't remember this at all. Except perhaps the eyeliner? Or was that during your goth phase?
lmfao what u don't like stories about some century-old bugger standing outside a teenage girl's room and watching her sleep?
i'm not sure we would tho. when we swapped, we brushed up against each other and there weren't any sparks. at least none of the sudden spontaneous combustion of occult and ethereal beings kind. i mean, it would be a sort of emergency measure anyway. but i think we'd be alright. could always test the waters a bit.
and goth isn't a phase, angel, it's a lifestyle.
[ He may be furious with God and apathetic to Lucifer, but he thanks Mary Shelly every day for going so hard. ]
i'm a demon, i'm supposed to flatter. i still mean it tho. and i'm glad u like them, they're only for u.
they are. not even the fun kind of terrible either. they're just sort of gray and flat, and it's clear no one actually wants to be there. hard pass absolute waste of 40£
we'll have to take it slow - just a few brushes, build from there. make sure it's something we can do if the need arises, back off if things look like they're going to go all supernova
could always bring back the eyeliner. and the long hair. and maybe the translucent black lace blouse i got to go with that coat from 1819.
Are you sure about that? The other demons seem to be rubbish at it. Although I guess they were all pretty mad at you at the time.
That's too bad. Sometimes an adaptation can salvage a paltry story. Humans have awfully questionable taste.
Yes, very slow. I absolutely don't want anything happening to you.
Now *this* I can easily imagine. If you ever fancy to bring that look out for a spin, I'd be delighted. Especially the long hair, although I wouldn't be able to resist touching it, so don't put it in any style that you wouldn't mind my hands on.
i mean they are rubbish at it. miserable bunch and it shows and no one's going to be tempted by misery.
u'd think they'd take the opportunity to do something interesting - expand on something or maybe reinterpret. but nope.
we'll be alright angel. i think if our essences were incompatible, we'd know for certain by now with all the fluids we've swapped. tbh the first time round, i thought just touching u might have the same effect as consecrated ground, but nope. not even a mild rash.
aziraphale you do know there is nothing i like better than u mussing up my perfect coifs because u got ur hands in my hair rite?
I'm glad you're not there. Even if we'd never met, you were given a chance to not be miserable on Earth.
They can't all be winners. Even Will had a couple of bad ones. Remember how I had to leave halfway through Titus Andronicus?
There's a difference between our corporations and our essences, but perhaps you're right. We've touched each other's wings, and those aren't merely in the physical plane. Speaking of consecrated ground, some time soon I'd like to properly thank you for coming into that church for me.
Yes, but I wanted to give you fair warning, because I also know how much you enjoy complaining about how I've made a right mess of your hair.
glad to be here too. like it better since it's here with you
i do! i was ready to give it a miss entirely but u like those gloomy plays. nearly lost my lunch a quarter of the way thru.
yeah, like i said, we'll go slow, but we should be alright. it's not like we're some entirely different species. and u don't have to thank me, not for that.
i'll complain neway bc u know i love 2 do that 2 ;) 2 birds, one stone.
for sohoangel
nope definitely not wearing yellow it clashes
with my hair.
fine. lied by omission to Herself's face. then spent 1500 years colluding with a demon. then told the heavenly quartermaster to get fucked b4 flying off to earth w/out a body and possessing some human. u were absolutely prepared 2 square up to lucifer fucking morningstar and then, the cherry on top, walked into hell and laughed in everyone's face.
did i miss something or do i rest my case
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Well...
When you list it all out like that, it does sound rather brave. But I don't think a Gryffindor would have taken quite as long as I did to finally do the right thing.
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neway i think the whole point of courage is that u get there eventually, even if it takes a while. and u had a lot on ur plate 2 deal with
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You're generous to say so. You were very brave, too, Crowley, even if you don't want to use that as a defining characteristic. I wouldn't have come around when I had if not for the example you set for me.
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tbf tho
u had a lot 2 lose. i know u believed that heaven was going 2 come thru in the end. i was kind of at a point where i had thought you were dead
so when u showed up in that pub, i was so happy u were okay that i might have got a little reckless u know?'
so i think ur definitely the brave 1 here
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I *wanted* to believe that Heaven was going to come through in the end. I'm still convinced that if I had gotten ahold of God instead of Metatron, it would have made a difference, but otherwise I should have listened to you sooner.
Did I ever apologize for how I treated you? I'm sorry for that, I truly am. I hope I've made it up to you since then.
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idt neone's getting ahold of Her. not even the higher authorities. w/ the great plan shot 2 shit, i think every1 is p much rudderless now. gotta start thinking 4 themselves.
and u don't have nething to be sorry about and there's nothing 2 make up. i should have been more patient w/ what u were going thru.
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That's going to be an intense challenge for Upstairs.
You were patient with me for a very long time, there's nothing to be sorry for, my dear.
Except for the way you spell 'anything.'
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can see a few of the lower ranks being alright. the big 4 tho...
and i wasn't patient. ur worth w8ing 4.
spelling is a social construct and i am the wrecking ball of chaos
w8
i was going somewhere with that but it kind of got away from me
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I think Michael can manage. It took all my effort not to gawk when she showed up in Hell with a pitcher of holy water. I don't know about the other three. Do you think they're just as lost Downstairs? I mean, they must be, they lost their cleverest demon.
That is very sweet of you to say. <3 Even if you are mangling the English language, one text at a time.
[He actually doesn't mind it that much, except for 'nething'. And mostly because he tried to look it up in the dictionary before realizing what Crowley actually meant.]
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ur right. michael is the kind of wanker who tends to do alright. on my end tho? downstairs is gonna be a mess. 14th century thinkers the whole lot of them. legion is about the only one with a clue about modernity, and u should see how they treat him. aspects of the poor bastard getting thrown to the hellhounds just 4 a laff.
a shame u missed computing in the 90s and early 2000s. u should have seen when i invented 1337 5p3ak
[ Because that could only come from Crowley's own devious machinations to drive the humans utterly up the wall with inane nonsense. ]
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Let's hope they keep their messes to themselves, then. I don't want to spend any more time thinking about them and their problems than I have to. We're retired, we should enjoy ourselves.
[Guaranteed to drive a certain angel up the wall, as well.]
Did your phone just have a glitch? All I see are random letters and numbers.
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if they do show up, we'll just come up w/ another clever ruse 2 scare the piss out of them and send them packing.
lmfao angel it's probably 4 the best u don't know. the dark ages of computing, terrible times, so much glow-in-the-dark lipstick it was definitely not a look 4 me
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Of course a hat can't know any of that. The whole sorting business saves Rowling the effort of proper characterization. She can have all the "bad" characters in one house with a few exceptions as plot twists.
Well, I wouldn't mind switching bodies with you again, if it comes down to it. Regardless, I won't let them touch you.
What does glow-in-the-dark lipstick have to do with anything? And don't sell yourself short, I'll bet you looked nice.
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angel r u implying that people are complicated? and defined by more than one trait ??? and that what counts as brave, loyal, clever etc. r all extremely subjective concepts? also j/s hufflepuffs got utterly short changed. the only interesting one died and turned into the worst vampire ever
u know u can inhabit my body any time. and likewise, i won't let them get get their dirty hands on u.
i didn't. dayglo green does nothing 4 my complexion and the hair extensions + wires were a Mistake. so so many regrets. absolutely killed it with the eyeliner tho.
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Not only am I implying, I am saying it outright. Or typing it, rather. They may be novels geared towards children, but that's no excuse to simplify characters to only one or two qualities. And yes, Hufflepuffs are barely acknowledged, except I don't remember any of them turning into a vampire?
Is it your turn to be implying something, dear? We'll keep each other safe. It's been my highest priority for centuries.
I am having an extremely difficult time picturing what you're describing. Wires in your hair? I'll need a photo of this to get a better sense of it.
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same actor who played the dead one in the film adaptations played the romantic lead from that teen romance with vampires about a decade back. for a time you couldn't go to any website without someone voicing one opinion or another about it.
not implying anything. dead serious - if u ever get discorporated again, ur very welcome to hop in my corporation. it might be a little cramped but i can budge up and make room.
ughhhhhhh i'll dig up the photos one day they're a laff. and u'll see what i mean about the lipstick idt anyone can pull off neon without the aid of photoshop
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Oh... the movies. [Aziraphale would insert an eye roll emoji here if he used them.] I'm aware of the vampire romance you're referring to, it was not my cup of tea.
Crowley, I wasn't kidding when I said that if I tried to possess your body, we'd probably explode. An angel and a demon's soul in one body is too dangerous. I appreciate the sentiment, though.
Jolly good! I suppose this was a very short-lived look on you as I don't remember this at all. Except perhaps the eyeliner? Or was that during your goth phase?
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lmfao what u don't like stories about some century-old bugger standing outside a teenage girl's room and watching her sleep?
i'm not sure we would tho. when we swapped, we brushed up against each other and there weren't any sparks. at least none of the sudden spontaneous combustion of occult and ethereal beings kind. i mean, it would be a sort of emergency measure anyway. but i think we'd be alright. could always test the waters a bit.
and goth isn't a phase, angel, it's a lifestyle.
[ He may be furious with God and apathetic to Lucifer, but he thanks Mary Shelly every day for going so hard. ]
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I know, amazing, isn't it? The mediocre writing doesn't help, either. Are the movies just as terrible?
[There's a noticeable pause before the next text arrives.]
Maybe we could. Test the waters, I mean. I'd be interested in touching you again without our corporations in the way.
Lifestyle, excuse me. Either way, I thought you looked good. But you always look good in eyeliner.
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they are. not even the fun kind of terrible either. they're just sort of gray and flat, and it's clear no one actually wants to be there. hard pass absolute waste of 40£
we'll have to take it slow - just a few brushes, build from there. make sure it's something we can do if the need arises, back off if things look like they're going to go all supernova
could always bring back the eyeliner. and the long hair. and maybe the translucent black lace blouse i got to go with that coat from 1819.
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That's too bad. Sometimes an adaptation can salvage a paltry story. Humans have awfully questionable taste.
Yes, very slow. I absolutely don't want anything happening to you.
Now *this* I can easily imagine. If you ever fancy to bring that look out for a spin, I'd be delighted. Especially the long hair, although I wouldn't be able to resist touching it, so don't put it in any style that you wouldn't mind my hands on.
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u'd think they'd take the opportunity to do something interesting - expand on something or maybe reinterpret. but nope.
we'll be alright angel. i think if our essences were incompatible, we'd know for certain by now with all the fluids we've swapped. tbh the first time round, i thought just touching u might have the same effect as consecrated ground, but nope. not even a mild rash.
aziraphale you do know there is nothing i like better than u mussing up my perfect coifs because u got ur hands in my hair rite?
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They can't all be winners. Even Will had a couple of bad ones. Remember how I had to leave halfway through Titus Andronicus?
There's a difference between our corporations and our essences, but perhaps you're right. We've touched each other's wings, and those aren't merely in the physical plane. Speaking of consecrated ground, some time soon I'd like to properly thank you for coming into that church for me.
Yes, but I wanted to give you fair warning, because I also know how much you enjoy complaining about how I've made a right mess of your hair.
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i do! i was ready to give it a miss entirely but u like those gloomy plays. nearly lost my lunch a quarter of the way thru.
yeah, like i said, we'll go slow, but we should be alright. it's not like we're some entirely different species. and u don't have to thank me, not for that.
i'll complain neway bc u know i love 2 do that 2 ;) 2 birds, one stone.
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From:Just noticed my dumb typo up there! Sorry. :<
From:lol no worries - i don't remember seeing any typo at all
From:Re: lol no worries - i don't remember seeing any typo at all
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